#.... listen. i feel seen by this. 😬

[mrs-monaghan]

Tbh I'm a jikooker, but I find it incredibly difficult to fit a healthy long-term relationship into the same timeline as all of jimin's solo work. It's not the pronouns or taking one lyric very literally, its the entire thing, plus comments from him and his producers. To me, you'd have to do some serious olympic level mental gymnastics to make that make sense. I don't doubt that jikook have a special bond, I've definitely seen things between them that definitely look like sexual attraction to me and things that surpass friendship boundaries, but I can't in good faith say that they're together in some official long-term way if I actually listen to jimin and his work.

I've seen some jikookers think they broke up for a while, but I have to question if those people have ever been through a breakup because the little bit of distance/separation/awkwardness we did see from them during chapter 2 is nothing compared to the type of tension that would be there if a relationship that intimate and intertwined had separated, especially considering the dark feelings jimin was feeling. He wouldn't have been cutely commenting on jungkook's lives and jungkook wouldn't have been asking to hang-out or getting excited to see jimin in his comments.

Idk, I'm sure someone could twist everything a certain way and only take certain things at face-value and then make everything else abstract, etc. to make the case that they are together, but I don't really see it. You look at face-off, alone, and just his general dark feelings during Face, then look at the creation of Muse and how him and his producers said he couldn't relate to the love-dovey beginning songs, which is how they ended up making Who (despite the fact that jikookers try to distance him from the song since he doesn't have writing credits even though he sat in the recording room telling them what he wanted and saying it felt like reading his diary). I think jimin could have very well gone through a pretty awful breakup along with the inner turmoil he was going through post-covid, but I don't think it was with jungkook if he did. I still enjoy jikook's bond either way at the end of the day, but yeah I don't really get how anyone can take an honest look at jimin's work and his words and think he was in a long-term healthy love-of-his-life relationship during that time or into chapter 2.

Not trying to change your opinion or anything, honestly I don't really see it discussed much in jikooker spaces (besides bad-faith stuff like tkkers stirring up shit over pronouns in lyrics which is just dumb) and when it is, some jikookers are pretty pick-and-choose about what they deem to be true to jimin's feelings and what isn't. Which I get being nuanced, but sometimes it does feel like a "well this fits my beliefs so clearly this is true to jimin and this doesn't so it means nothing because he didn't write it" or whatever. I honestly get annoyed with the bad-faith arguers because it prevents being able to have actual discussions about some of this stuff in our little jikooker corner of tumblr. Like "he said her, he's clearly straight! he danced with a girl, straight!" stfu.

I don't have much to say to you anon. Not really. Not anything that hasn't been said anyway. Which you've seen and decided its jkkrs doing mental gymnastics. "I'm a Jikooker but..." its never a great way to start a sentence. It just gives major insecure jkkr vibes which i just 😬😬😬😬😬😬😬 you either believe in them or you don't. There is no if, and or buts.

I will leave you with this; over the years, antis and (insecure) jkkrs alike have always found a way to conclude Jkk aren't as close anymore or they broke up or some other bullshit. But what happens everytime Jikook resurface and we see them together again?

NOTHING HAS CHANGED!!!

Nothing ever changes with these 2! They come back closer, more in sync, happier, more in love and their relationship more established than ever. This happens every👏🏽damn👏🏽time👏🏽 Everytime!

Then the insecure jkkrs will be like "jkk is real" again.

And then we will go without content for a while and once again we are back here with the jkk aren't as close argument. Once again. It is an exhausting cycle that I refuse to be a part of.

You can try and nit pick various reasons as to why Jikook aren't in an established rlship, but I will chose to focus on reasons why they are definitely 130000000% in a relationship. Like the fact that they are enlisted together rn, the fact that they could have done AYS with other members but chose eo. Or the fact that Jimin wrote his name on JK's chest with sunscreen and I dont even want to imagine how he did that. What position they were in that would justify people calling them brothers 😂

You do you anon. I'mma just be over here enjoying Jimin promote the hell out of his favourite JK song.

Tweet

Look at him so proud of his man 🥺🥺

[lilgarbitch]

The Voice of an Angel- Matt Dierkes

Part One

Pairing: Matt Dierkes x PornBlog!Reader

Cw: Smut, Masterbation (f and m), sappy freak!Matt

Word Count: 3.5k

Author’s Note: Doing something a little different. The story seemed to work best if I wrote time in phases, so I hope it doesn’t ruin it😬 And I couldn’t tell you where this idea came from. I honestly don’t know if I’ve ever seen someone write something like this, but I did the best I could❤️ I hope you enjoy

Tags: @xmads-omensx @dontwantthemoney @theanarchymuse95 @badomensgoodomens

Y/N | Wednesday 2:36 PM

Kicking off the floor and rolling my chair over to my computer, I plug my phone into the cord and begin transferring the audio file. I should really get a microphone for this, but I’m still somewhat new to this… Yeah, I definitely need to start doing research on vamping up my equipment.

I plug my headphones into the laptop once the file was finished so I could listen back over the audio, making sure it’s suitable to be posted. I live alone, and literally just made all of these noises out loud, but I still get a little weirded out playing it without headphones and need to be able to listen to every detail, making sure there were no weird noises in the background.

Clicking on the file, my voice starts playing through. It took some time for me to get used to hearing me say certain things and make these noises, hell, it took me a good while to even hit ‘record’ when doing this, but once I got enough praise from people online, it just became routine. 

My slightly over exaggerated moans and whimpers fill my ears, and I can’t lie, I was pleased with the quality. IPhones have good microphones. It sometimes even picked up the sound of my vibrator or how wet I was based on how close I had the mic to me, and my followers always enjoy that.

After spending about twenty minutes editing out small distracting background noises, I opened Twitter and connected the file to a post, captioning it, "You know exactly how to pull these pretty sounds from me,” before hitting post and then proceeding to do the same for my tumblr blog. 

Almost instantly, my phone starts going crazy from those who have my post notifications on, and I read every comment with a smile on my face.

It may seem weird to many people, but I truly enjoy doing this. I get to turn a common activity into a side hustle, and it pleases both guys and girls when they find my pages. And most of them are the sweetest when they reply. They’re usually all horny replies, but unless I post something that instigates them to degrade me, they always choose to be super sweet.

I scroll through some replies and the likes from my followers, and even some who always come back but choose not to follow me because they don’t want others to know. It was nice seeing repeated faces. Like I created a space for them to feel safe to be open about something so lewd. 

That’s when I got a notification from my Cash App that’s linked to my accounts, causing a small smile to form on my face when reading the name. ThotxPleaser had been a loyal follower for a while now. He’s following my Twitter, Tumblr, subscribed to my Patreon, and here he is again, sending me a gift. 

ThotxPleaser- $250

Sounded beautiful as always, Angel❤️ 

I really wished that his gift had caused a bigger smile, but I knew this anonymous person’s actions too well by now. He usually gave me a sweet nickname, but today he just used my pseudonym, Angel, and it wouldn’t be worrying, if he also didn’t send the donation right after I posted, again. He always tried to send appreciation ‘when he had the chance,’ even commenting that he was too busy sometimes and felt bad for seeing my posts so late, so it was abnormal that he was so on top of it for the third post in a row, almost as if he was waiting for my posts as a pick-me-up. I know that was cocky thinking, but he’s said before that my posts have made his day, giving me a grateful gift to prove it, so it wasn’t that far off of an assumption. I just hope he’s doing okay.

Matt | Wednesday 2:59 PM

I crash into my bed with a groan. We’re getting everything situated for tour next week and I’ve been working my ass off doing almost all the work. The boys and our team do the best that they can, but I’m the one they run to when problems surface, and with the dates coming faster and faster, everyone is running rampant with anxiety and constantly on my ass needing help with the most obvious things. I know we’re all stressed but every part of my job other than actually getting them on that tour bus is done. 

I told them all to give me at least the rest of the day off to unwind. Any problems that come to head today can easily be fixed tomorrow. I warned them that I was switching my phone to Do Not Disturb so even if they tried to contact me, I won’t answer.

It was a lie, though. I would never actually do that to them and hopefully they know that. I just need them to understand and leave me be for at least a few hours before I burn out. And, of course, almost right as I thought that, my phone went off. 

With a loud groan, I turned my phone over and glared at it, trying to read what the hell the problem was now, but then my heart skipped as I read the notification. 

Angel💋 

You know exactly how to pull these pretty sounds from me

My breath hitched as I read it and I instantly felt blood rush to my other head. This had to mean that she finally posted a new audio clip. I instantly clicked on it, desperately needing to hear her to put me in a better mood. My fingers eagerly tap at the back of my phone as it takes a minute to load up Twitter, but when it finally does, I see the audio file and click ‘play’. 

I shove my face into my pillow and place my phone next to my head as I let her voice and moans fill my ears. As the audio plays, I can feel myself getting harder. But I am too fucking tired to do anything about that right now. I truly just needed to hear her sweet voice in a time like this. I could listen to her for hours. It doesn’t matter if it’s her talking dirty or making these sweet noises. Hell, she could start a damn podcast and talk about the weather and it would still make my day. Something about her voice always brought me out of any rut that I’m in. 

The audio ends and I finally look back at my phone. I debated on playing it again, just to hear her, but I figured it wouldn’t hurt to show her some gratitude and appreciation. 

I open up Cash App, using the account that wasn’t under my real name, and send her a simple note. I didn’t have enough energy to put too much thought into it, but she deserved something after boosting my mood. After I sent it, I closed my phone and shoved my face back into my pillow, this time with a small smile. Within minutes, I was out like a light, dreaming of what she could possibly look like, and having a chance to actually have her speak to me, just to be able to hear more of her voice. 

Y/N | Saturday 6:23 PM

It’s been a few days since the last donation from ThotxPleaser. I try to post a few suggestive posts a day if I’m in the mood, and every single one was instantly liked by him, but that was it. No flirty comments, just what seemed like he was already on his phone when I posted and a simple like. I know I shouldn’t worry about a random follower, but he has always been so sweet and supportive. Plus, as creepy as it may seem, I end up paying close attention to my supporters, and it was obvious that he was acting different than usual. 

I tried pushing the worry out of my mind the best I could, not needing to stress over a damn audio blog supporter, but I couldn’t help the fact that my mind wandered, thinking of what could possibly be happening in his life that he was too busy to show his usual appreciation, but still forcing him to be one of the first likes on every single post, audio or not. What could he possibly be dealing with that made him seem like he was so busy that he barely had time to do much, yet he still went out of his way to give me a hint of support? Fuck, I’m sounding insane. Am I overthinking this so much that I truly believe this man was using my moaning audios and lewd posts as his main form of serotonin? God, I need to fix my ego. He’s probably just losing interest and slowly weaning me off his attention…Okay, Y/N, he’s a fucking follower. He doesn’t care about ghosting you. You’ve never even spoken. Why are you so obsessed anyway?

I let out a groan, getting annoyed with my own thoughts. I realized that I was staring at the ceiling, worrying about someone I don't even know, so I quickly sat up and grabbed my phone, hoping that doom scrolling could help distract me…and make me feel less embarrassed.

I open Instagram and my eyes instantly land on the story bar. I scroll through the orange and green circles, hoping to find someone interesting, when I finally do. Matt Dierkes had a new story. I click on it and instantly giggle, seeing that, of course, it was another raccoon meme. Since this was my personal account, I liked his story and went on with doom scrolling.

After seeing only reposted memes and people living their best life, I realized this wasn’t going to give me the entertainment I needed. I close the app and look at my others, before opening Tumblr. Matt was still on my mind. I always found him so cute. I’ve enjoyed Bad Omens’ music for a while now, and definitely found the boys attractive, but something about their tour manager had always caught my eye. He said whatever he wanted and enjoyed things without judgment. I really liked how unique and undeniably him he let himself be.

I try to scroll through my feed, but with him still in my mind, my fingers trailed over to the search bar and I found myself looking up another fanfiction about him. 

After a few…okay maybe a little too many one shots and short stories since I was free tonight, I landed a quite…spicy story, leading me to decide this was the perfect time to create more content. 

With the story playing in my mind like a movie, I set my phone up and hit record. I was too lazy to grab a toy, and was definitely worked up enough that I could easily get this done manual style. Lying back, I slipped my hand down my pants with his face flashing behind my eyes. In the story, he had a little more dominant energy, so I began imagining him taking what he wanted.

My breath picked up as I felt his hands sliding up my thighs, using enough pressure to keep them held to the sides. He had this almost hungry look on his face as I stared down at him. His fingers finally reached the hem of my panties before powerfully yet gracefully sliding them down, like he was teasing me, making me wait. 

I could feel his warm calloused fingers grazing over the softness of my thighs as they trailed towards my core. I began to squirm in anticipation, desperately wanting to grab them and bring them where I needed him most, but I knew if I did, he’d find a way to punish me. 

Finally his hand reached the apex of my thighs and I gasped as he grazed his fingers through my folds. 

I’m getting too desperate, I have to get this little fantasy sped up. I start circling my clit and letting out a soft whine. 

His tongue passes through my slit before finally focusing on the bundle of nerves. My breath picks up as he perfectly laps at it, occasionally circling it with his tongue. As he adds more pressure, I can feel myself getting closer. I look down and see his face between my thighs, causing a small gasp to escape my lips. Once our eyes meet, I let out a breathy moan as my head falls back against the pillow. I can’t control the noises leaving me, the sound of his tongue lapping at my wet core and the image burned into my mind of him staring up at me causing the pleasure to intensify.

As I reached my peak, my mind overwhelmed with ecstasy, I forgot where I was. 

“Ma-“ I let out, before quickly gasping and covering my mouth, hoping I could play that off as a gasp of pleasure and not shock at me almost ruining my audio by saying his name. After catching my breath, I stop the recording and sit there. 

Fuck.

Matt | Saturday 9:47 PM

The guys and I were hanging out at Noah and Jesse’s house, telling ourselves that we needed a night off to relax and leave the stress behind for a few hours. Everyone’s mostly packed and we have at least tonight to just forget about everything, so they were all a few beers and shots in and it was getting kind of rowdy. I made sure to keep my eye on everyone to make sure they didn’t do something stupid. 

I was sitting on the couch as the rest of them either destroyed the kitchen, trying to drunkenly make snacks, or hung out in the backyard, just chatting or getting excited over revisiting places on the tour they enjoyed. I was silently watching them all, using this time to try and force some relaxation into my mind, knowing we agreed that we could take a break from work. I know I could have done this at home, but doing anything with these boys was better than doing it alone, since I could always end up hunched over in laughter at any moment.

I stare off, listening to them loudly argue over which cheese to put in a grilled cheese, and just let my mind wander over how life has been going lately. Thinking about what still needs to be done and what fun things I could try to do before I was slaving away for 3 months on tour, since even when I tried my hardest, I couldn’t push the thought of work away. But then I was pulled out of my thoughts by my phone vibrating in my pocket. I pulled it out and saw that Angel had posted a new audio. God, this is exactly what I needed right now. A small smile formed on my lips, but I quickly went back to a straight face, not wanting anyone to see and question who made me smile or find out that it was a goddamn porn blog. 

I glanced around the room, making sure that everyone’s attention was occupied, before sneaking my way off to the bathroom. I close and lock the door behind me and pull out my Airpods. I know the house was loud, but the thought of them hearing her voice coming from the bathroom was not something I wanted to deal with. 

I put an Airpod in and click on the notification. Once it loaded, I pressed play on the audio. It was a short one, but it was definitely enough to put me in a better mood. Instantly, her sweet sounds filled my ear. Soft airy moans played through my Airpod and I could feel myself growing in my pants. I debated whether it was weirder to jerk off in their bathroom or to leave the bathroom with a hard on, and decided on the latter. 

As her voice played through my headphones like a beautiful melody, I reached my hands down and pulled the waistbands of my shorts and boxers down, letting my growing cock spring free. I turned my hat around, pushing my hair back to keep it out of my face as I leaned my hips against the sink and gripping the edge with one hand. I wrapped my other hand around the base and firmly gripped it. 

She let out soft whimpers with an occasional ‘Fuck’ and I leaned down and let a trail of spit reach my tip, biting back a groan as I collected it and used it to slicken my movements. It was just the perfect amount of lubrication to move at the pace I needed without making any noise. 

I brought my shirt to my teeth and closed my eyes, biting down as I fought back the noises collecting in my throat. I was close to biting through my lip and I didn’t need to get a noticeable mess on my nice tee. Explaining the teeth marks in the fabric would be easy, if their drunken asses even noticed. Her breath picked up, a telltale sign she was close, and that itself caused a tightening in my stomach. I listened to her moans getting higher and higher, subconsciously pumping myself to the beats of her breath. But then, she let out a moan I had never heard before. They were usually whiney and breathless, but this time she used her full chest voice, moaning out a ‘Maa-‘ before gasping and finally letting out her usual whiney sinful moan as she came. 

Something in my brain took that personal. It sounded too close to her moaning my name for me to prepare for the instant rush of pleasure taking over my body. I quickly cupped a hand over my tip as my eyes rolled back, my mind replaying that single sinful syllable over and over as I spilled into my fist. 

I probably bit a hole in my shirt with how hard my teeth clenched as I forced the deep loud moan from coming out. But I didn’t care. I had to hold my weight up with the sink behind me and force myself to catch my breath through my nose as the pleasure in my stomach lasted longer than it ever has before. 

After a few moments, the feeling of my cum threatening to drip from my hand caused me to finally open my eyes and drop my shirt from my teeth as I spun around and turned on the sink. I quickly washed all the evidence down the sink and tucked myself back into my pants before looking up.

I stared at myself in the bathroom mirror, grimacing in post-nut clarity as it hit me how gross what I just did was. Not me jerking off to her, that was normal, but the fact that I had gotten so obsessed that I couldn’t wait until I got home to listen and react. 

I hung my head as I thought about how the fuck I was supposed to get through tour if I couldn’t stop myself from listening to her audios, but also definitely wouldn’t have a way to hide my reaction from them. I just wish I could hear her in any way other than something so erotic. That could hold me over. As long as I didn’t pavlov myself into getting hard just at the sound of her. 

I reach up and fix my cap before grabbing my phone and sending her a like and a comment. 

ThotxPleaser- Could never find a better way to make my day, beautiful. 

I softly laughed at myself as I sent it. I knew I was a freak. She probably thought I was a creep the way it looks like I stalk her with how fast I respond to her posts. But I couldn’t care less. She brought me a happiness I couldn’t explain. It wasn’t the context of her posts. It was her. And I had to show my appreciation, even if I just looked like one of many horndogs in her comments and donations. 

Wait…That was it. 

I fumble with my phone to open up Cashapp, before realizing how long I’ve been in the bathroom. I make my way back to the living room as I think of the perfect way to ask. Sitting down, I debate on the most convincing price to get her to even think of helping me out here. Tour starts Tuesday and with us all together, missing a chunk of change won’t be a problem. I go back and forth in my thoughts for a few minutes, writing and rewriting my message until I think it’s perfect. Finally, I send it and cross my fingers. 

ThotxPleaser- $1,000

All I want is to hear your voice more. Talk about your day, how the weather is treating you, or rant about a TV show you’re watching. I’d listen to you forever. All I ask is if you’d be willing to send me voice memos here and there to get me through my days. Name your price, sunshine. 

TO BE CONTINUED

[svltzmans]

casual - cassie howard

cassie howard x fem! reader

a/n: like every other lesbian, i've been listening to a lot of chappell roan and this song seems like a perfect prompt for my first time writing angst 😵 it's not really great so i just made it a one shot and definitely did not proofread lol

warnings: 18+ smut, angst with no happy ending 😬 but i'll go back to happy stuff soon i promise!

y/n's nails dig into the leather of cassie's car, her body sprawled across the passenger seat.

cassie pushes y/n's legs further apart, her head remaining buried between them.

her tongue circles y/n's clit, leaving her lightheaded above her. y/n's nails really start leaving marks behind on the seat, but she can't find it within her to care.

"just like that, cass," y/n mewls, her body instinctively pulling towards cassie.

cassie had quickly discovered that y/n was intoxicating to her, the countless times they had hooked up only adding to her desires.

y/n's orgasm finally hits her, her hands reaching up to the windows to brace herself.

cassie pulls away, wiping her mouth on her shirt with a smirk.

"you're amazing," y/n mutters, still catching her breath.

cassie smiles slightly before preparing to start the car.

"can't you hang out with me for a little?" y/n asks, disappointed seeing cassie prepare to take her home.

"maddy invited me out," cassie justifies, reaching for the door handle.

"why do you always leave?"

the sadness in y/n's voice creates a thick silence in the car. cassie stops moving, staring blankly forward.

"y/n, you know this is just... for fun, right?"

"what the hell are you talking about?"

cassie sighs, running her fingers through her hair. she finally looks at y/n, ditching her avoidance of eye contact.

"we can't, like, date," cassie manages to blurt. "doing this with you is fun, but you know i can't do a relationship right now."

"that certainly isn't what you've been implying."

"y/n... i'm not trying to be an asshole. but i've never implied we were going to date. or that we were anything more than friends."

y/n inhales sharply, trying to keep herself composed. she's hurt, and she feels it in every inch of her body.

"i spent the summer with you, at your family's house. your mom cooked dinner for me and told me stories about you as a child. lexi and i became friends. we've kissed in front of them, cass. what do they think we are? what does maddy think we are? she's seen how inseperable we have been this whole time."

cassie sighs, looking away from y/n again. her expression is somewhat cold as tears start to gently flow down y/n's cheeks.

"i told them it's been... casual. they know we've just been hanging out."

"hanging out?" y/n raises her voice slightly, her outrage becoming more and more apparent.

"cassie, this whole time you have been acting like someone who has genuine feelings. genuine interest. you never told me you wanted any of this to be casual. if you did, i wouldn't be here right now."

"what do you mean you wouldn't-"

"i would have protected myself."

cassie is taken aback by that, shuffling restlessly in her seat. "you don't have to protect yourself from me, y/n."

"no, i do, because i've been falling for you and it all has meant nothing to you."

"y/n, that's not true-"

before cassie can finish her sentence, y/n is gathering her belongings, exasperated.

she pulls the door open, hesitating as if she was waiting for cassie to speak.

when she doesn't, y/n steps out of the car, roughly shutting the door behind her.

[2minutesnotice]

Why People With Mental Illness And Trauma Deserve Love

(and why Blitzø Buckso is one of them)

Grab yourself some snacks and a drink, I'll have a talk with you people who go all for the

"If you can't love yourself, you can't love anybody else"

mantra, which is toxic as fuck.

And sorry for the typos 😬🥲

SPOILER WARNING Full Moon

tw:mental illness / coping mechanism / self harm self worth / shitty parenting /abusive and toxic relationships

First of all, I'm autistic, so a lot of scenarios I'll give you will come from my experiences because it's easier for me to feel empathy that way and explain a situation.

BLITZØ IN FULL MOON

People come into my DMs and want to rant with me about him. I get it. It seems he's an asshole.

And he IS.

Blitzø has multiple character traits which are trauma coded and boy what a can of worms that is. Most of them are really hard in your face, like the fact that he can't stand his own face in pictures.

Which comes from a deep rooted self hate, which comes up in self worth issues. Blitzø had his fair experience with drugs and alcohol , even drowned himself in last to get over his shitty experience with Stolas at Ozzie's.

I'm not saying he's suicidal, but Blitzø's biggest fear is, to die alone.

Because he KNOWS how he is. That makes him really self reflected. He knows how he behaves, he knows his own coping mechanisms.

That's why it's so easy to make him mad. He's mostly angry at himself in most situations, so it also happened in Full Moon. Blitzø uses anger to get things out of people, because most people react to anger, but he's not doing it to HURT people, it's the only way he knows how to get an reaction out of people.

The reaction HE wants. Since Blitzø has no self worth he has no clue WHY people should love him. So he shoves them away and keeps them at distance.

At the same time he CRAVES intimacy. And here's the conflict. Blitzø's love language is sex.

He feels the closest to people if he can be intimate with them. And yes, even in a weird "I fuck Chaz to be close to M&M" kind of way. He is krass with his talking about sex, he over shares, he LOVES to talk about sex.

Because he's good at it. And because it gets him close to people. If the show had more time I bet we would've seen Blitzø having multiple one night stands over the time. Yes, even with his arrangement with Stolas. Because there was sex before there were feelings. Definitely.

Shitty Parenting x Self Worth

Blitzø got sold by his own father as a play buddy for a rich kid. Yes the rich kid was Stolas and it was cute, but still, rich kid.

And we all have seen, that he wasn't good at what his father made him do in the circus but what Blitzø always had, was his pride. Also, he's very good at making things up as they go. Doing that damn horse balloon and making a joke about it, shows how he is capable of selling himself still as the best, even if it isn't so.

We don't know much about Tilla, but we know Blitzø definitely had a closer relationship to her then to his father.

I know we only have two concrete scenes which show what kind of an relationship Cash and his son had, but the "I wish you were my son" card for Fizz kinda draws us the picture here.

As a child who always had to compete with a sister which was highly gifted, this does something to you.

You try to be better, at any cost. Sounds familiar?

"I'll try to be better".

But what? In what will he try to be better? I think Blitzø doesn't even know at what he will try to be better, he just does not want to lose this. But what is this?

RELATIONSHIPS

IF Blitzø would have just cared about his business, he would've walked away with the crystal. Just like that. He would've said

"Thank Satan, I thought I would lose my business,thanks Stolas, it was nice as it lasted" and he would've been gone.

But he didn't. He listened to what Stolas said but he didn't LISTEN. Because it was confusing as fuck, even as The Audience just watching it was a LOT what was said and going from

"I'll let you go" to "I have feelings for you, please stay" in a second.

And of course Blitzø would not understand that. Because Stolas could not MEAN it. Because Stolas has servants who are Imps and he called him names, a plaything and if Blitzø is anything for Stolas, at first, he's a whore.

Blitzø sold his body for a service. For his business.

They could have made that arrangement about ANYTHING. Money, another hitman service, bodyguarding.

STOLAS made it about sex. The thing Blitzø knows, the one he CRAVES, the thing he is good at, besides killing people.

But the one thing Blitzø is not good at, are words and feelings. And Stolas had a lot of them, at once. And it felt not fair for Blitzø to be cornered like that, because he had no idea what was expected from him. And then he used the ONLY thing he knows, which always gets something out of people: Anger.

That's the words and feelings he knows.

And he got an reaction, but also had to deal with the consequences.

STOLAS AT FULL MOON

I love Stolas. But he he's living in a romance novel world and there's also, trauma.

Stolas first words I had imprinted in my mind were "I always thought love could be fun". He wished for a happy family his whole life and all he got was an abusive wife and a loveless marriage.

He is a dreamer. Someone who loves the small things and he is caring. He loves to indulge in fiction, he loves telenovelas because even if there's drama, there are relationships. Something he never had experienced.

Stolas is a soft soul. But he's repressed and depressed as fuck. And that's not only because of Stella, but his upbringing and the knowledge to live in a Golden Cage. But he never voices that he has problems with THAT.

See, Stolas is a prince, he grew up with servants, Imps mostly. In a palace. Even if he despises Stella's parties, I bet if he wouldn't be an outsider in his own race, he would be the one doing the parties himself. It would do him some good because Stolas is also, lonely.

While Blitzø lived in Circus tents and tried to proof himself, Stolas had to proof that he's worthy his title as a prince. Being married, the whole heir thing, his duties.

And then Blitzø appears out of fucking nowhere, seducing him (like in his novels!), staying with him the whole night (showing him he's obviously gay), showing him he can choose, that he HAS A CHANCE to be happy.

With Blitzø.

And then we see the duet and the second Stolas sings about how he wants this to go, I knew they will fuck up. Because Stolas had played out this scenario SO OFTEN in his head, that he has so many images of Blitzø in his head that he knows this will not work out good. He has hopes and dreams but in the end, the decision falls on Blitzø.

So we go to Full Moon and Blitzø reacts... poorly. He even mocks him. And then he starts screaming and shouting and guess who else was always shouting and screaming? Guess who told Stolas his whole marriage that he's not worth anything. That he's not worth of love, that he's a failure, that his head is in the clouds and mocked him about everything he loves.

Blitzøs only way to cope with too many feelings is anger, Stolas trauma is based on anger and rejection.

But Stolas reacted so FAST. He gave Blitzø the crystal and he told him that he gives him the offer to stay, because he has feelings for him (like in his novels!) and his hopes are so high and the second he does not get what he wants, what he needs, he snaps. He's disappointed. He's hurt.

Because he wants this so bad to work.

But it can't, because they're for now reading the same book, but they're so not on the same page.

Because, and now we're getting there, they have to deal with what was said.

TRAUMA AND RELATIONSHIPS

I'm married for ten years now. My wife and I met each other 20 years ago.

I was suicidal back then, I cut myself regularly, I was depressed and had an eating disorder.

But I had friends. And I had relationships. And I loved so so deeply.

And then I got together with my wife 11 years ago. I was freshly diagnosed with being autistic, my wife has ADHD.

She also has several PTSD triggers, I have childhood trauma from living with my Mom who's an alcoholic.

And yes, I am able to have an relationship. We love each other dearly, we care about each other. We learn from each other, daily.

We have bad days, but we are GOOD for each other.

Because you DESERVE TO BE LOVED, no matter what.

In the first place is always that you're responsible for yourself. You can't trauma dump on your partner in excessive ways because that's not healthy. BUT learning to share your experiences but still being responsible for yourself and your actions, is a whole different thing.

You can love and be loved, even at your lowest.

But you have to be aware that your partner is not your therapist and that communication in a relationship, in which both parties are mentally ill, is KEY.

You have to go to the same ground, you have to explain what are your boundaries, what are your triggers but you have also to accept that the other one is sometimes not able to deal with your package.

My wife and I, we communicate DAILY. We have totally different needs. We have totally different views and patterns to deal with things. But we love each other.

Because we respect each other's differences.

And that's the homework for Stolas and Blitzø. They don't have to TO GET BETTER, they have to grow and they have to listen, communicate instead of just dumping expectations at each other.

You can't expect someone to break a pattern that is carved by trauma, just because you tell them you love them. And you can't expect that someone's listening when you push all their triggers at once.

I'm really excited how this will go. It's heartbreaking but I guess now that everything is said, they can finally be honest, without all the trauma dumping and pushing buttons.

And as I said:

You're worth of love. You're worth to be loved and you can give love, even at your lowest. Your deserve love, even at your lowest. You ARE loved.

Thank you for reading! ✨ Gold Star for you!

[newkatzkafe2023]

Hear me out what would the monkey kings reactions be if their monkey wife gets the same circlet they had on themselves to be on her head

Oh god why would you ask something like that?!?!?!??!?!?oh my god😟😟😟 (I'm being dramatic but still😦)

(Lmk Wukong) Yoooooo he is mighty pissed right now, he left you out of the celestial war for a Motherf*cking REASON!!!!!!!!😡🤬 He knew damn well you would escalate the situation especially with your weapon and how many Celestials lost their lives to you. Though to punish you for something you were not responsible for like at all, it made his blood boil remembering it. Which is why he made to take extra good care of you.

(MKR Wukong) He's also SUPER PISSED AT THIS!!!😡😡😡😡 it's bad enough you were both put in Separate mountains, but for you to suffer from those glorified shock collor. ARE YOU KIDDING HIM😡😡😡😡, which is why any offense and mistake you made he would gladly take the blame or accountability for. It's no problem at all after all he had dragged you into this situation, and is ever so sorry for it.

(NR Wukong) He feels horrible about it to this day, not to mention you were his second in command in the war. Then you were put under the same mountain and he would spend all those years apologizing for what happened, but your were more angry with heaven then you would be with him. Then it's gets worse when you are made to wear the circlet as well and those things are painful!!!! Wukong made sure to protect you from it's effects despite your pain tolerance to be higher then his.

(HIB Wukong) Yoo I feel he got the worse of it like seriously It was bad enough he had to listen to you cry in a Separate mountain for 500 years especially since you couldn't see him. Now when he's let out, he finds that they put you in a blood diamond and a forced circlet on you I swear THEY WANT TO DELIBERATELY PISS HIM OFF, he comforts you every time you were shocked. Even with your Extremely high paint tolerance, He hates this and angry at heaven and at himself.

(Netflix Wukong) Oh cool matching crowns his first though, but then he saw what they were really for and boi was he scared and Furious at the truth of them. I mean considering you went to help your husband fight heaven all those years ago, it was kinda expected but very much uncalled for. He always made sure to cuddle and kiss you pain away whenever they were used and would take the pain himself when ever.

(BMW Wukong) Ohhhhhhhhhh sh*t.....this, this is probably the most Angry anybody has ever seen him like it's claws on sight😡😰 You don't ever in your long or short life EVER HARM HIS QUEEN UNDER ANY GOD DAMN CIRCUMSTANCES!!!!!!!!!!😡😡😡😡 Wukong is Furious, vindictive, but gets responsible as he takes the blame for all your offensives but once he gets you out of that F*cking shock collar it claws on sight with Erlang👿👿👿👿

(Destined one) that was a dark and terrible time, after all you were there with that fight with Erlang. You had jumped in to help your husband in battle but you both lost at the time. Then that horrible circlet that would shock to to kingdom come, you always had a high pain tolerance but you were still uncomfortable and that was enough to make the destined one irritated and Vicious he's gonna make sure you won't have to worry about a thing.

FEEL FREE TO REBLOG😬

[emeritusemeritus]

if you’re taking requests can you do fred x artist!reader maybe? it’s okay if not though! (:

Hi love! Let me start by saying I’m sorry that this completely took on a life of its own. I started writing and I couldn’t stop, too engrossed in the story. I wasn’t sure what kind of art you wanted to include so I made the reader a painter/ designer and an all round creative. I’ve sobbed writing this and I’ve even had to split it into two parts because I’ve fallen down a hole and written over 8 thousand words, not joking.

I hope you enjoy! I shall now go and rest 😂🖤

Part 2 will be posted HERE once it is uploaded.

Warnings: ANGST. Sadness, breakups, illusions to cheating, breakup references. Happy ending I promise! Talks of marriage, proposals, Hagrid and his creatures, Fang being the goodest boy. Lots of tears and sadness but it gets better! Not beta read nor spellchecked, apologies for any mistakes. Timeline is a little wonky (picturing it OOTP just before the twins departure but there’s no war/no Umbridge)

Word count: 4.9k [Part 1&2= 8.2k] 😬

The Artist and the Entrepreneur part 1

You walked into your dorm in an exhausted slump, trying desperately not to sigh too loudly of our sheer exhaustion in order to not wake your dorm mates. It was nearly 11:30pm by the time you had made it back to the dorms, having to wake and then calm down the fat lady who was not willing to listen to your explanation of why you were out so late. You needed to bathe and get to sleep, ready for classes the next morning but you could barely function, trying desperately to summon the energy to undress and make your way to the bathrooms. It was a necessary evil but it had to be done and so you dragged your near-lifeless body to the bathroom and began running a bath, which thankfully filled up quickly with almost perfect temperature water. You grimaced as you peeled the uniform away from your body, wincing at a particularly nasty wound on your right forearm which you would attempt to heal after you'd bathed. Your hands were covered in paint, mud and whatever else had made their way under your nails, arms littered with paint splatters and other vague marks.

Sinking down into the water, you forced yourself to stay awake feeling suddenly soothed by the warm water, both physically and mentally. It had been a hard couple of weeks, stretched beyond your means as your timetable suddenly doubled. You were tired, exhausted and still there was another week to go of this madness, but it would all worth it on the end.

You dried quickly, assisting yourself with a flick of your wand and dressed into your pyjamas, hardly managing to scoop up your dirty uniform on your way back to bed.

5am came much quicker than you'd have liked. It was almost as if you'd closed your eyes and opened them again only a minute later. You crawled out of bed trying again to stay silent and reached for the clean set of uniform and robes on the chair beside your bed, kicking the lump of dirty uniform under your bed to deal with later. You slipped into the bathrooms to dress so that you wouldn't wake anyone and slipped down to the common room, pray in that you didn't see anyone on the way. You cast a glance at the boys dormitory staircase and felt a stab of sorrow thinking of Fred and how you'd barely seen him in the past two weeks. You were often gone before breakfast and not back until well past curfew, not that either of the twins ever abided by the rules.

"Oh shush," you said to the fat lady who had begun her usual spiel of sounding the alarm due to you being out of bed out of hours, not listening nor remembering the speech you'd given everyday for the past two weeks as you attempted to sneak out. You couldn't afford to be discovered by the prefects nor any teachers roaming the corridors, as above board as your mission was- you couldn't risk Fred finding out what you were doing.

Sunlight shone through the windows as you made your way around the castle, holding back a shiver at the coldness of the castle in the late March morning, your robes doing very little to shield you from the chill. You crept out of the castle and marvelled at the beautiful first rays of daylight peaking through the trees of the forbidden forest. You looked ahead and saw that smoke was billowing from the chimney of Hagrid's hut, the only sign of life against the otherwise serene backdrop of the forbidden forest. You made your way slowly, enjoying the peaceful walk down to the hut, hoping that Hagrid had put the kettle on in anticipation of your arrival.

"Morning y/n!" Hagrid says with a wide smile, bustling around in the small hut, much too awake for this time in the morning. Fang in stark contrast lay slumped in his bed and half asleep, continuously disturbed by Hagrid's banging. A steaming cup of tea lay waiting for you on the table and you thank him graciously, taking a soothing sip of the hot liquid. You look at the clock on the wall beside the window as see that it's nearly half 5 now, the sun rising in the sky and greeting an almost ethereal light across the magnificent castle, a sight that still amazed you even seven years later.

"Beautiful isn't it?" Hagrid asks, noticing you gazing up at the castle and you share a smile for a moment, the tiredness having faded now thanks to the alarmingly strong cup of tea that you'd now become accustomed to.

"Ready to get to work now?" He asks, watching you drain the last of the tea from the large mug. You try to hide your disappointment from being dragged out once again to the edge of the forest, knowing that you'd signed up for this. You nod with a smile, navigating around the large table as you move towards to door behind Hagrid. You shoot a look towards Fang, wanting to give him a parting stroke but you notice quickly that he's fallen back to sleep and so you leave him alone to snooze, wishing that you could too.

It was nearly half 8 when you walked into the great hall, taking a brief detour to the bathrooms as you washed your hands and to hide any evidence of your morning. Your early start was already catching up to you and you hid a yawn behind the sleeve of your robe as you walked through the doors of the great hall. You checked your robe one last time for any signs of evidence but thankfully you were clear, noticing only a moment later when you took you'll place at the table that there was a great dollop of pint upon your shoe.

"Here she is," George says from across the table, nodding his head towards you as you climbed onto the bench beside Ron in the gap between him and Neville.

"Switch with Y/n Ronald," Fred says from beside him without a hint of a please. Knowing he won't get any manners out of his older brother, Ron complies and shifts up to allow you to sit beside your boyfriend.

"Thanks Ron," you say, trying to hold off the yawn that was threatening to break free at any moment.

"Morning beautiful, you're late," Fred says, his hand slipping across your back as you pour yourself a large glass of pumpkin juice. He frowns at the coldness of your robes beneath his fingers but doesn't say anything. "You overlay again?"

"Yeah," you lie, feeling immediately guilty about the fact. "Snape's set us a load of work, took me ages to figure it out last night. Didn't get a lot of sleep." As if to prove your point, the yawn you'd been suppressing finally escapes with so much force that it makes your eyes water.

You manage to force down some toast, staying quiet as the conversation continues around you. The first bell rings and you barely hold back a sigh, detesting the fact that you'd have to get up again.

"I can walk you to potions?" Fred says, holding his hand out to help you off the bench. You're quick to conceal the paint on your shoe and if he notices, he doesn't say anything.

"And have you late for charms again?" You counter, raising an eyebrow at your boyfriend who just shrugs completely unfazed.

"Haven't seen you much lately, thought you'd been avoiding me."

His words feel like a stab directly to your heart, knowing that you were guilty of avoiding him, though it wasn't in a negative way. Your craved the time with him, of mischief in the late hours and spontaneous moments in hidden corridors and empty classrooms.

"I promise I'm not," you say with a smile, trying to vanquish his idea completely as you lean up to press a kiss to his full lips. His arms immediately grab your waist as he pulls you in for a deeper kiss that borders on inappropriate but you relent, unable to resist after not seeing him properly for so long.

"So, potions?" Fred smirks, pulling away. You chuckle, placing your hands on his chest.

"For me? Yes. For you? No, get to charms," you order playfully, leaning up to give him one last peck on the lips before turning away. "See you at lunch!"

You can hear his boyish chuckle as you walk away down the corridor in the opposite direction of him, praying that he would be entirely too focused on the swishing of your behind and that the paint on your shoe would go entirely unseen.

By lunch you were completely exhausted, too tired to even notice the suspicious side-eyes from the identical twins as they watched you poke around at your food and down a second cup of very strong tea, having outwardly complained that the first one was too weak. Uncharacteristically for them, they said nothing and continued to chatter amongst themselves, keeping the conversation open for you though you didn't give much imput.

"Fancy the black lake tonight, after hours?" Fred whispers in your ear, knowing even without looking that a smirk would be tugging at his lips. You inwardly grimaced, cursing your ridiculous secret plan as you wished more than anything that you could join him. You were running out of excuses now, finding it hard to keep track with what you'd already lied about.

"I can't tonight, got an essay for snape in the morning I've still not finished," you say with a guilty expression, almost wincing as the words too-effortlessly tumble out of your mouth. "Friday night I promise?"

He seems put out almost instantly, never one to be able to conceal his emotions well. He looks frustrated, confused and rejected within seconds of each other and gives a halfhearted nod at your counter offer of Friday instead.

The bell rings signalling the end of lunch and you hope for a kiss before parting but lose all hope when you feel his lips briefly brush your hairline and he runs off to catch up with George and Angelina.

You avoided the common room after classes, choosing instead to sneak down to Hagrid's a little early, thankful for Thursday evening Quidditch practice which meant that you wouldn't cross paths with Fred.

"Y/n, I'm nipping out tomorrow on dumbledores orders, think you could nip down and check in everything while I'm gone?" Hagrid says as you out dutifully complete your given task, hoping to get it done quickly so you could try and salvage a bit of time tonight for Fred. His questions throws you off for long enough that you feel a hot gust of fire breezing past your right ear, followed by a burning sensation in the same spot. He's quick to act and gets you out of harms way before any more damage is done whilst you remain slightly frozen in both fear and contemplation. You knew you couldn't say no, in debt to his generosity and so you simply nodded, already dreading the implications of your acceptance.

It's late once again when you arrive at the common room, only half an hour til curfew, and despite your attempts at hiding your tiredness and attempting to appear happy and neutral, you can't help but feel the guilt swirling in your gut when you see Fred and George pedalling their products to the younger students with wide smiles on their faces and still dressed in their quidditch uniforms. You sneak up to Fred once he's done with a sale and slip behind him, placing your hand on his shoulder to alert him to your presence. 

Only, when he turns around his smile slowly fades upon realisation that it's you and your heart immediately begins to break, knowing that it was the other way round. He doesn't instantly reach out for you with his big grabby hands like usual nor does he attempt to kiss you. You try and salvage the situation, putting more effort in, trying to be as normal as possible but he seems to see right through the act.

"Wanna sneak out? I hear the black lake is beautiful this time of night." You say with a smirk, trying desperately to mask your tiredness and to hold it together. He doesn't jump at the chance as you hoped and instead casts a cursory glance to George before turning back to you.

"Can't tonight, got to restock the snack boxes with George," he says, briefly touching your hand before a third year calls his name, hand outstretched ready to buy one of his creations. Your stomach sinks, knowing that it's a lie and the irony of the situation only seems to hurt you more as you feel your eyes well up with fresh tears. You excuse yourself immediately, not even greeting your friends who you can tell are watching the tense exchange and you hope more than anything that no one follows you. You're completely depleted with exhaustion, running on hardly any sleep and completely overworked by your own doing. Suddenly the outcome didn't seem worth it and you regretted ever starting, finding your idea foolish.

You let your tears flow as you shower, passively washing away the fresh marks from the day off your arms, the clear gel and the colourful spatters draining away down the plug hole with your tears. You wince in pain when the water falls directly onto the freshly wounded skin behind your ear and your neck, execrating yourself for missing that spot despite Hagrid's warnings.

Too tired and upset to face going back down to the common room, you give up and reward yourself with an early night, though you feel anything but rewarded.

5am came around once more and more than ever you begrudgingly pulled yourself from the warm bed and slipped into the bathroom, the reminder of Fred's rejection playing on your mind from the second your eyes opened. Had you dreamt about it? Either way his reaction was firmly imprinted on your mind and you couldn't get away from how desperately painful it was to have him reject you like that. You slipped out of the common room on autopilot, closing the door with a little too much force already anticipating the fat lady's usual ranting and slumped off towards Hagrid's hut. The skies looked as sombre and sorrowful as you felt, covering the sky in a dull grey hue that seemed to dull the normally beautiful sunrise. You were quiet this morning, not rude or impolite but simply quiet as you worked alongside Hagrid, consumed by your foreboding thoughts knowing that you would still have to cancel Fred tonight, if he even cared anymore.

Once your morning jobs were complete, you decline any further invite to stay and decide instead to sneak back into the castle for breakfast, hoping you could join your friends and boyfriend like usual. Breakfast had only just begun when you walked into the great hall, having made your usual stop off at the girls bathrooms on the way and you're not surprised when the only person sat at the table is Hermione who's already got her head down in a book. She lifts her head up to greet you happily as you sit opposite her at the table, beginning to place her bookmark on the page she's on but you tell her not to, to enjoy the peace whilst she can. She shoots you a grateful smile and you sit enjoying your second cup of tea in peace, thankful you could make this happen today. You knew it was at the expense of your other jobs and you'd most certainly pay for it in the long run but having half of the morning to reset still felt good.

"Morning," Angelina says as a sits down at the table next to Hermione who this time only says a passive greeting, much too engrossed in her book. Angelina reached immediately for a glass of pumpkin juice before rubbing her eyes and yawning at the early hour.

"Not been sleeping well?" You ask with relative concern for your friend, watching her yawn for a second time within seconds. "Staying up late trying to find a loophole in quidditch rules again?" You joke with a smile, watching as she shoots you a mock glare even though it was most probably true, only to be interrupted by her third yawn.

"I wish! Still never finished reading that rule book," she snorts. "I know there's something there I've missed." She takes a sip of her pumpkin juice and you watch as she swallows down another yawn. "I was at the black lake with the twins last night, didn't get back til late."

It's amazing that you don't choke on your own pumpkin juice as the words glide out of her mouth, your stomach sinking like a stone at the implications. You knew Angelina and there was no malice nor hidden meaning behind her words but it still stings more than getting caught in the path of a Ukrainian Ironbelly. Fred had openly lied to you, had rejected you and had invited Angelina in your place. You're frozen in place by the revelation but Angelina doesn't notice, now heartily tucking into her breakfast, though you do notice hermione peeking over her book to look at you. Tears begin to prickle your eyes as the sinking feeling in your gut consumes you, your thoughts spiralling out of control. He didn't want you anymore, you'd pushed him too far to come back from, all with him in mind.

You barely noticed when Ron, Ginny and Harry appeared at the table but you noticed immediately when you heard two very familiar voices echoing as Fred and George walked into the great hall. You had to leave, you had to get out before then took their places. A part of you, wether it was self-punishment or morbid curiosity wanted to stay and see if Fred would chose to sit next to you, to see if he'd interact with you or be cold and distant but you couldn't do it, knowing that the latter would kill you. You stood up so quickly that you bumped your knee on the bottom of the table with a resounding thud that seemed to draw everyone's attention to you but you didn't stick around to shrivel under their curious gazes. There was no way you could avoid Fred now as he made his way to the table but you couldn't do anything about that. Placing your hand over your mouth, you feigned queasiness and ran out of the hall, straight past Fred and George.

Climbing up the spiralling staircase from potions, your stomach sank when you saw a familiar form resting against one of the pillars in the corridor, his shining red hair leaving no doubt as to who it was. You waited for your fellow classmates to disperse, signalling for Alicia to go ahead with the others, leaving you and Fred alone. You half hoped for the first time ever that you'd gotten the twins mixed up

And that it was actually George that was waiting for you but as you walked over with a faux smile on your face, there was no doubt in your mind that it was Fred.

"Hi," you said, sounding awkward even to your own ears. He gives you a look, apparently having noticed your unusually formal greeting too and reaches out for you as if nothing was wrong. His touch feels wrong, the lies feeling like an impenetrable barrier between you and you don't sink into his touch as you usually did, nor do you make any attempt to reach out for him in return.

"Still want to go to the black lake tonight?" He says, reaching out to play with a strand of your hair from the haphazardly thrown up ponytail. His words feel like a knife, like a taunt of what you missed out in last night. Did he know that you knew about his jaunts last night or was he planning on denying the entire thing and acting like nothing was wrong?

You couldn't bite your tongue any longer, the unyielding sleep deprivation affecting your ability to regulate your emotions and you pulled yourself back out of his reach with a venomous look in your eyes.

"Thought you'd have seen enough of it with Angelina last night,' you spit out, the quickly fading logical part of your brain hardly believing that you were having this conversation with Fred, the downfall of your relationship taking you completely by surprise as it's ungodly pace. He blanches, face flushing pale as his ears turn more and more pink upon hearing your words. His eyes widen momentarily and the sickness in your gut increases as you note how panicked he looks, your fears confirmed that he was intending on not telling you anything.

"Princess," he says, trying to bounce back from his momentary shock as he reaches out for you but you avoid his hand entirely, blocking him by slightly turning your body to the right, away from him.

"My name is y/n," you counter, uncaring for his term of endearment. His brown creases but in a flash it's gone, his gaze now focused on your ear. You watch as his eyes harden, no longer looking guilty as his eyes set into a hard stare that grazes across your face until he finally looks into your eyes, somehow in competition with you for how angry you can gaze at eachother.

"It's not my whereabouts that need questioning though is it?" He says through partially gritted teeth, unrelenting eyes staring into your soul.

"What are you talking about?" You counter, trying desperately to hold onto your anger but it's quickly draining from you under his suspicious scrutiny.

"Seems you forgot to hide that one," he spits, pointing to the mark behind your ear. Your gaze softens immediately as you realise what he's pointing to- the pink mark on your neck. In your haste to not set your hair on fire in potions, you'd quickly tied up your hair and had completely forgotten that the mark on your neck would now be visible.

"Fred," you say, the tables turning on you now as you cower under his powerful gaze.

"Thought it was odd that you kept disappearing," he says with a grumble, his voice sounding so cold and distant that you barely recognise it. "Who is he?"

"What?" You ask suddenly, quietly, completely floored by his accusation, your mouth agape as you look upon the heated gaze of your boyfriend, though you quickly realise it may be the last time you can call him that. Never had you thought that he would have accused you of cheating. Finding out your secret maybe but this? Never.

"You heard me, who is it? Bet it's Towler isn't it," he sneers, almost spitting as he says Kenneth Towler's name to taunt you. "Reckon he's long overdue for a second dose of bulbadox powder."

You're frozen in disbelief at the furthering accusations he's spouting, his mind already wandering back to Kenneth Towler who's skin had erupted into boils during your fifth year thanks to Fred putting Bulbadox powder in his pyjamas when he'd come on to you a bit too strongly during a mid-season Quidditch game. Fred had been so distracted upon seeing Towler attempt to drape his arm around you that it caused him to miss an oncoming bludger that caught the tail end of Wood's broom, throwing him off balance and equating in a deciding goal that had given Ravenclaw the lead, that then resulted in their victory over Gryffindor. Fred had been furious, not at you naturally but at Towler who he'd declared had lost them the whole game and had vowed a form of revenge by adding the bulbadox.

"It is isn't it?" He prods, taking your silence as confirmation.

"No!" You say with vengeance, wanting to shoot down that accusation straight away. "There's no one," you add. He huffs out a humourless laugh that makes your entire body fill with dread.

"Well someone's giving you those marks and it's certainly not me!" He argues, "haven't let me anywhere near you for weeks, which is funny because you're usually up for it whenever."

Your blood runs cold at his words and you resist the instinctual urge to slap him right across his stupid face. It's like the four years of your relationship have been nothing to him; pulled apart and mocked by one single comment that now made you question everything. Was that all it was to him? Were you just easy and available? You felt physically sick by the thought and you were certain that nothing had ever hurt you so deeply before. The boy you'd fallen so helplessly in love for, the one with the fire red hair and the cheeky grin that only ever seemed to have eyes for you had changed so quickly right before your eyes. The very boy that had supported all of your creative dreams, encouraging you to keep painting and keep creating even when you doubted yourself or lacked inspiration. Merlin, most of the time he was your inspiration.

You realise that there's nothing left to say, that any further attempt to defend yourself will only fall on deaf ears and by his last comment, you weren't sure it was worth trying to salvage the joke that had been your relationship. You thought of the secret you'd be hiding, of the real reason you had been sneaking away and lying to him, so far away from his assumption that it was almost laughable- but now completely void of any importance. There was no coming back from this. What you assumed to have been love for the past four years had completely disappeared from his eyes and you knew from this moment onwards that all you would ever see when he gazed upon you would be pure disdain.

It feels like every bone is breaking in your body simultaneously as you walk away, like your heart is directly under the cruciatus curse with the sheer volume of anguish within your body. You've never felt pain like it, completely unable to distinguish exactly where it hurts or why. You let vision is blurred and your body physically hurts, your ears ringing from the screams of pain that resonate around your head but are trapped inside your mind. You don't look at Fred, you can't, nor can you bear to listen for him calling out to you as you walk away, the last glimmer of hope gone. 

You consider returning to your dorm and locking yourself away for the foreseeable future, skipping all of your classes and sobbing until you can't anymore as you body screams for you to do but you can't. You can't let anyone see you like that, nor would you be able to answer anyone's questions or deal with their stares. And so, you run to the one place you knew you'd be safe.

Fang greets you enthusiastically the second you push through the door to the empty hut and collapse against the door with a roaring cry. The anguish in your cries is one that you'd never heard emitted from yourself or any other human and you no longer fight back the floods of tears that fall down your face like an unstoppable river that had broken the dam. Fang, sensing your distress, walks over to you and calmly sits beside you, placing his huge head in your lap as you cry. You hold on to the lovable boarhound like an oversized teddy bear as the tears flow, uncaring about the inevitable puddle of drool that he'll leave in your lap, the comfort of the sweet dog more needed than ever.

You don't know how long you sit there crying with your pal by your side for every moment but eventually the tears begin to slow, your breath finally evening out though your heart still pounds, much like your head. Fang lifts his head slightly, his big eyes peering into yours and you give him a thankful smile through the tears, even if he doesn't know exactly what you're trying to convey. He gives your arm a little nudge and in your near delusional state, you assume that it's a reply to your thankfulness. You chuckle, giving him a good scratch of appreciation on his wrinkled forehead at the absurdity of the situation, but you'd be forever thankful that of all things, Fang was the only one that had held you together in your darkest moment.

[the-overreactress]

I didn’t watch Gilmore Girls as it aired, and there are definitely people out there (likely some of my mutuals!) that watched it in 2000-2007. (For the record, I started watching it in syndication sometime around 2008.) But the thing is…I notice more and more that the show is intentionally misinterpreted or dissected using the standards and ideals of the 2020s. And you know, that tracks because it happens a lot with shows made during the 90s and early 00s. (Looking at you, 7th Heaven 😬)

I just…I feel like we also have to understand the cultural context for why a show like Gilmore Girls or any of the other WB teen dramas were made. The WB channel was created in the mid-1990s for several business related reasons, but one of them was to compete with teen programming made by UPN and Fox. The WB went through a lot of iterations (e.g. picking up Sister, Sister, original: the Jamie Foxx Show, Buffy, Felicity, Dawson’s Creek), but it’s primary focus at the time was making content for teenage girls. Gilmore Girls was the channel’s saving grace after a dip in viewing in 1999 until 2006 when the CW was formed with CBS.

Everyone has likely heard the story that ASP actually came up with the premise of Gilmore Girls on the spot when in a pitch meeting at WB, and it all evolved from there. The thing is…I just…other than the Connecticut setting and the WASP-y Gilmores, the references, music, and jokes of Gilmore Girls are entirely unique and pay homage to a bygone era of comedy. They’re also products of their time, both in positive ways and negative ones (i.e. any of the fatphobia jokes).

However, there’s not anything basic or cliched about having the likes of The Shins or any of the other alt/indie bands Lane, Rory, Jess, et al. listen to on a tv show in that era. In terms of music/soundtrack, Gilmore Girls is actually fucking stellar and better than the vast majority. You have to imagine Amy and the other music supervisors really knew what the fuck they were doing. (I’d kill for a biopic showing the making of Gilmore Girls from this angle!) Lorelai has peak Gen X taste, while Jess, Rory, and Lane are part of that really cool generation of Gen X/Millenial cuspers who got the best of the 80s, 90s and 00s underground.

Watching Gilmore Girls practically requires you to build up a certain level of pop cultural literacy. It’s actually why re-watches of the show are so great. You see and hear things you may not have seen or heard when you were 11, 15, 18, or even 28. I just wish this part of the show was given more attention and credit, in addition to the plots, characters, and fashion. It’s just as much part of the iconography of Gilmore Girls as the other things (if not more!)

[thecoolerliauditore]

ok this may be parasocialism but r.e. the podcast episode recap saying grian seemed incredibly tired. i sometimes get the feeling that grian is like, worryingly overworking. hasn't he said in the past that he developed anxiety/panic attacks as a direct consequence of his youtube career? and i remember last christmas when the life series merch got fucked up, someone posting a screenshot of an announcement he made in his discord where he mentioned being incredibly stressed and upset about the delays & like, hand-writing recipients christmas cards to try and fix it. again this may be parasocial but with what you're saying abt life series, i think being aware of how toxic a career being a youtuber can be and how the dream job sunshine and rainbows presentation is. lets face it, certainly a white lie

oh absolutely. added ontop of that the pressure you and your series must face when your friends (coworkers) bills also depend on you (<-- not really, grian has no obligation to pay anyone else's taxes, but i think we can all agree that skizz being able to go full-time for example has everything to do with the life series)

announcements like that and other behaviour we've seen from grian and the cast is why I'm so 😬 about the whole "we don't care about viewer feedback, we just want to have fun" line. In a perfect world sure that would be awesome but it's pretty clear to me that's maybe not the most fully honest sentiment in the world. I keep having to reiterate that I hate assuming CC's feelings but there comes a point where we're being presented direct contradictions and it's like. well I'll believe it once the next season rolls along and grian and scar team up and gem can be smug and mean again.

lots to say but whateverrrr been listening to a lot of bo burnham - art is dead recently how about you guys

[kindestofkings]

nepobaby²

elijah hewson x pop singer! reader

authors note: reader is matty healy's lil sister cause I loovvvee connecting my two fav bands.

ENJOY THIS EVERYONEEE, happy holidays <33

yourusername

liked by charli_xcx and others

yourusername thank you thank you THANK YOU everyone for all the love and support over this album !! it was the product of heartbreak but now its the thing bringing me all the joys <33 tour continues next week cant wait to see all you sexy beings :))

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yourfan1 where is the deluxe version of the deluxe version?? i need it now

yourfan2 thank u for giving us this 

charli_xcx the QUEEN of pop

yourusername are you kidding?? have you seen yourself?

denise_welch so so proud of you my darling girl !

yourusername mumma<333

denise_welch

liked by trumanblack and others

denise_welch my eldest and my youngest. having a fab time on our summer holidays 💕💕

tagged: trumanblack and yourusername

view all other comments

bedfordanes75 yourusername you look rightly fed up

yourusername is it that obvious?? rass75 what were you arguing about trumanblack think this was just after she told me to stop using the word meta yourusername literally no need to hear its so much, what is meta in mallocra matthew ?? trumanblack who needs to say slay so much? sorry for having a developed vocabulary denise_welch kids... yourusername sorry mum trumanblack sorry mum

1975fan1 i love that they are normal siblings even tho they're killing it in the music industry

yourusername posted on their story!

my mother and my mother?? confused but continue

bedfordanes75 charli is v upset she thought she was mother ↳ I can explain..... taylorswift hahha stop it shes the best! can't wait for you to join us on tour 🕺 yourfan1 I love you all

ynfanupdates

liked by yourfan1 and others

ynfanupdates guys omg I was just at the 1975 gig with my sister and yn was their special guest😭😭😭 best. day. EVER.

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1975fan1 I died when matty said its annoying being the least talented singer in the family

ynfanupdates did he lie tho she sounded inCREDIBLE, had the whole place hoppin

yourfan1 omg what did she sing??

1975fan1 she sang cruel summer coming out and then she sang she lays down with matty! usually the boys leave the stage when they have a special guest but they all stayed and played for her it was ADORBS ynfanupdates one thing the boys of the 1975 are gonna be is overly proud of yourusername

yourusername thank you so much for all the love guys I was SO NERVOUS lol

ynfanupdates omg hiii no we would have NEVER KNOWN, you were so good yourusername 💕💕

yourusername

liked by elijahhewson and others

yourusername the 1975 family you really know how to make a girl feel welcome ! thank you for singing so loudly and embracing your inner pop girlie with me. sorry big bro for making you cry and getting all the talent in the family 😬

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trumanblack oi I just did a nice thing dont come for me

yourusername sorry cant hear you through all your tears?? what did you say? rass75 how did we end up with the uncool healy? trumanblack mate youre meant to be MY bestfriend

1975fan1 fav sibling duo

inhalerfan1 oh hello eli in the likes??

inhalerfan2 I ALWAYS notice him omg imagine they dated

denis_welch proud as always watching you two doing what you do best never gets old!

yourusername

liked by bobbyskeetz and others

yourusername like paris in 45' 🕺😏

city of love has me feeling all kinds of things, would I lose my job if I wrote songs about being in love instead of heartbreak??

view all other comments

yourfan1 MOTHER id listen to anything you release

inhalerfan1 not the inhaler lyric and discussions of LOVE

inhalerfan2 being delulu and obsessing over how hot of a couple yn and eli would be inhalerfan1 girl me toooo yourfan2 she's never this secretive of boyfriends tho inhalerfan2 shusshhhh

bedfordanes75 we have a WHOLE song called paris that you could've used....

taylorswift me too :(( trumanblack she's too busy fancying bonos son to care yourusername im gonna kill you charli_xcx ratty youre an idiot

inhalerfan1 HEHEHEH LOOK AT MATTY'S COMMENT

yourusername

liked by elijahhewson and others

yourusername not me curating the most perfect of perfect soft launches for my IDIOT brother to ruin it all. well I tell you I wont let a manchild who writes quotes about crappy coffee and boys ruin this for me ! you dont know who that is got it? GOT IT?

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trumanblack I NEVER SAID THAT QUOTE

bedfordanes75 life's too short to drink crappy coffee ☕️☕️ rass75 and cry over boys 😭😭🙍🏻‍♂️ yourusername who dont care 🤷‍♂️🙅‍♂️🙅🏻‍♀️💅 1975fan ahahahhahahahah boom roasted

bobbyskeetz he clearly doesnt know how scary you are over this subject...

yourusername !!!!!

inhalerfan1 I am so so happy right not

yourusername and why miss inhaler fan would that be?? I suggest you reread that caption hmmhmm inhalerfan1 truly terrifying but im sorry the third picture is my proof yourusername i give up it was just too cute to leave out

bbcradio

liked by yourusername and others

bbcradio we had the fabulous yn healy come visit us in in the bbc live lounge ! Follow the link in our bio to see this pop queen's cover of jeff buckley's lover, you should've come over 🥹

tagged: yourusername

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yourusername had SO MUCH FUN !!

inhalerfan1 respecting your soft launch mother but this has me gagged teehee

yourfan1 I beg of you to release this on spotify its a NEED

bobbyskeetz huh interesting song choice

ryanmacmahon_15 wonder if theres a deeper meaning to this selection joshjenkinson_ theres someone who kinda looks like him, isnt there? yourusername I dont know what you're implying... who even are you three???? inhalerfan1 heheh not you pretending not to know them while following all three of them

deuxmoi

liked by ynfan1 and others

deuxmoi theres a hot new couple on the block

view all other comments

ynfan1 I hate this account so much like respect their privacy

inhalerfan1 holy fuck it's true then

inhalerfan2 wow are we gonna talk about that letter

ynfan2 who do you think wrote it ? inhalerfan1 its giving Eli vibes to me ynfan3 could not be theirs ...

yninhalerstan why is no one talking about the contents of the letter?!?! man literally wrote you fill my head with sweetness and you fill my head with YOU

inhalerfan1 sleeping on the motorway tonight ynfan1 I am sooo single it hurts

bobbyskeetz stay out of it like

yourusername damn having my very own alexa chung moment rn

yourusername

liked by elijahhewson and others

yourusername to answer the burning question: yes we met at the daycare for nepobabies 😏

also the last pic is for the nosey bastards at deuxmoi !

tagged: elijahhewson

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elijahhewson still waiting for my love letter...

yourusername alri I dont know if I can be the alex to your alexa, what about a few love songs? elijahhewson yeah guess that'll do yourusername get ready pretty boy inhalerfan1 PRETTY BOY ynfan1 damn we lost her

bobbyskeetz THANK GOD this has been awful to keep in

ynfan2 damnn can believe I lost the love of my life to an irish boy

yourusername a very pretty irish boy that makes me v happy, does that help or make it worse? ynfan2 really 😭😭 really 😭😭 happy for you 😭😭

inhalerfan2 nepobaby²!!

trumanblack you promised me you wouldn't date until you were at least 35..

yourusername 👁👄👁 we're just friends..

denis_welch both so gorgeous! great to see you so happy

ynfan2 damn he makes her happy 😭 😭

yourusername

liked by trumanblack and others

yourusername surprise! my next album fuck, I'm in love is gonna be yours next month <33

cause im in a giving mood I thought I'd give you a look at the covers AND the a sneak peak at the tracklist mwah xx

1. lover 2. mastermind 3. nonsense 4. the archer 5. dress 6. gorgeous 7. bad for business 8. false god 9. good in bed 10. your power

(please listen even tho they're happy )

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yourusername also big shout out to bedfordanes and miss xcx for help with the production xxx

bedfordanes sick songs but also so very disturbing that the littlest healy is thinking like this charli_xcx such a baby ! songs are just as hot as you girl 🔥🔥

inhalerfan1 those song titles...

ynfan1 oh MY GOD good in bed ?? LOVER is this a dont listen around your parents album??

yourusername well tracks 3,4 and 9 are off limits for my brother and mum if that tells you anything ynfan1 mwhahahha miss girl you're iconic

ryanmcmahon_15 oh he's gonna be unbearable after this

joshjenkinson_ like he isn't already bad enough he's dating one of the biggest popstars rn inhalerfan1 lol eli in his wag era elijahhewson and proud of it 💅💅

ynfanupdates

liked by ynfan1 and others

ynfanupdates BEST DAY EVERRRR guys I got invited to yn's secret show in london tonight and it was the best thing to ever happen to me 😭 it was such an intimate show with only a handful of fans there and she sang the entire new album. also her brother matty came on and played guitar for your power, which had me SOBBING

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ynfan1 wow im sooo envious was it just fans?

ynfanupdates no it was like for all her friends and family ! ynfan1 sooooo was he there? ynfanupdates who do you think shes smiling to?? he was ofc there and the rest of inhaler

ynfan2 what are the songs like ? can you remember any lyrics??

ynfanupdates not really I was so in the moment and I'm gonna gatekeep them cause you will enjoy them more next friday! ynfanupdates but ill tell you what she said before the archer! said that it was written about her brother (matty) and how since she's always looked up to him, and she can't believe that he isn't more assured in himself or something ynfan2 ahhh I cannot wait

inhalerfan1 what was your favourite??

ynfanupdates soooo hard to choose but i think gorgeous or mastermind ! she was so clearly happy singing them <3

yourusername I too cry at the sight of my brother I dont blame you ! thank you for coming and thank you thank you for not leaking any lyrics <33

ynfanupdates my pleasure 💕💕💕💕

liked by elijahhewson and others

yourusername wow releasing an album just before silly season was HECTIC. but I wouldnt change it for the world! thank you for all the love for fuck, im in love the first couple shows have been INSANE.

got up to some other fun aswell as doing shows, I mean it is silly season after all !

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taylorswift tis the damn season !

elijahhewson fuck that first pic..

yourusername yeah? im too busy looking at the hottie in the second pic... bobbyskeetz you both make me SICK trumanblack agreed you should both break up rn yourusername as IF you weren't the one throwing a hissy fit over the fact he's not coming for christmas

joshjennkinson_ seems like an unfair pic to choose ...

ryanmcmahon_15 done so dirty yourusername but you all look soooo tall!

denis_welch can't wait to have you back for christmas !! enjoy Ireland first

yourusername me too! I'll be home on the 23rd :)) inhalerfan1 ahh shes going to eli's!!

yourusername just added to their story!

replies:

trumanblack and why in gods name do you always us this pic

↳ yourusername its the definition of socially awkwardness hahaha

bobbyskeetz get ready for the worst hangover ever afterwards

↳ yourusername terrified on multiple levels

elijahhewson hahahha you've met them so much it's grand

yourusername

liked by trumanblack and others

yourusername if im just a girl how am I now a homeowner??

another amazing thing to finish of this AMAZING year 💘

comments have been limited

trumanblack STOP GROWING UP

denis_welch I agree with matthew

elijahhewson woohoo homeowners next step dogowners ?

yourusername we have not got it in us to be parents in any capacity babyyy elijahhewson :((((

Check out part two here xxx

[mommahughes19-23]

Ocean Eyes - Q.H

A. N : based off this "I was listening to ocean eyes by Billie and all I could think about was quinn and his beautiful eyes, so imagine him dating this singer and she dropping a Ocean eyes by surprise on her ig, Quinn finding out like that while being in practice or warming up and he kinda feels like crying out of the love he feels �� ❤️ and everyone just teasing him in a loving way💖"

y.nmusic : Stream my newest song inspired by the man I love the most @_quinnhughes 'Ocean Eyes' streaming on all platforms now! 💓

tagged : @_quinnhughes

location : his ocean eyes

bboser : thanks for making him cry ... he won't leave the locker room now 😤😤

eliaspettersson : @y.nmusic we quiet legit needed him for the rest of practice smh 😭🤬

↪ tdemko30 : @y.nmusic @eliaspettersson I dont think Ive ever seen him tear up this much what did she do to him 🫨🫨🫨

user10938920 : OMG OMG OMG I KNEW IT WAS ABOUT QUINN

ilyamikheev66 : @y.nmusic @_quinnhughes just added the song to every version of our practice playlist we have 😬😬😬😬

_qunnhughes : @y.nmusic im at a loss for words baby , I really didn't think I could fall more in love💓❤️

↪ jackhughes : ew that's sickening 🤢

↪ lhughes_06 : get a room you two @_quinnhughes @y.nmusic

bradytkachuk : FUCKING BANGERRRRR @y.nmusic Im sure quinny is crying in the club🤑🤑🤑🤑

↪ _quinnhughes : @bradytkachuk SHUT UP

↪ y.nmusic : no way THE Brady Tkachuk just complemented me @bradytkachuk🤑🤑

ehtkachuk : BEAUTIFUL SONG BY A BEAUTIFUL GIRL 😍

lindhomelias : send him with tissues for the next week @y.nmusic he won't stop blubbering

zadorov_16 : when's the album listening party

↪ y.nmusic : who said your invited ?? @zadorov_16

kuzya_096 : am I invited to the listening party? @y.nmusic I wanna get a clip of Quinn crying like a lil girl

↪ y.nmusic : OF COURSE YOU ARE KUZZYYYYY AS LONG AS YOU SEND ME THE VIDEO YOU GET

dakotajoshua8 : @y.nmusic you couldn't have waited till after practice he won't stop crying long enough to hit a damn puck🤧🤧

A.N pt 2 :

I know it's short and I am so sorry because I am leaving to head to work! I wanted to get this posted for my beautiful baby asap though so I might re work some of it when I get home tonight!

jasmine says thank you to @lukey-pookie-hughes43 and @skylershines for the birthday wishes!!! lots of luvvvv

xoxoxoxox, M

TAGGED : @skylershines and @lukey-pookie-hughes43

[panlight]

also continuing off the Informed Traits discussion, just how much of Caslisle's compassion/kindness is informed? Bella and Edward both make it seem like he's this saintly figure and pillar of goodness, but then there's moments where he does things that make you wonder if the view on him is just really rose-tinted.

Again, going back on BD where he invites his friends to witness and doesn't seem to care that they're hunting humans just outside forks/la push and let's them stay even after already knowing what their presence triggers the tribe to phase, the book also reveals that he took Jacob's blood sample to study without his consent?? Like a lab experiment???? (I learned this through a post showcasing that part in the book) Also in a podcast I listen to that discusses the plot of MS, he apparently fakes being Billy's distant relative (impersonating an indigenous person uhhmmm 😬) and, well,,,, lets just say I can see why some people think that entire phone call just gave colonizer vibes. AND!!! didn't he drug a woman to steal their car and kinda doesn't react much when they caused a massive car pileup??

On the one hand i dont mind if it's meant to show us that even Carlisle's sense of morality is flawed, but between Bella's "the Cullens are good to the core" and every time Edward talks about him in MS, it's feels more to me like another unreliable narrator trope.

This one is harder for me because, see, I want the compassion to be real because I think the concept of a vampire blessed/cursed with Super Compassion is legit fascinating! As I've said about 23470234 times, my favorite aspect of vampire stories is how they become a vampire, how you cope, the choices you make, what you accept and what you deny about your new reality. The idea that for this one guy, becoming a vampire made him even more compassionate is just the kind of twist on it that I've never seen anywhere else and I think it's really interesting, actually. A dud of a superpower, sure; the innate push-pull of vampire instincts vs super compassion compels me, though.

But obviously I can see where it comes from that it could be an unreliable narrator thing or outright lie. Or at least a show vs tell problem where we're told he's compassionate but actions suggests otherwise.

I think it falls apart in two major ways:

The protagonist-centered morality. Everything in the story is about facilitating the E/B romance. Carlisle's alleged compassion can only help that, he can't hinder it. They HAVE to move back to Forks so the story can happen, he can't say "huh maybe it's NOT compassionate to move back to a place where people know what we are and are terrified of us." He can't refuse to drug the soccer mom because they have to save Bella! He can't object to having witnesses gather in Forks and force more teenage boys to phase and put humans at risk of being eaten because we have to save Renesmee! He can compassionately offer Bree surrender, but neither he nor Esme can do any more than that to try and save her, because that would complicate Bella's upcoming wedding. The Bella-centricity of it all sits like a supermassive black hole in the middle of the story, disrupting the orbits and bending the light of the other characters.

Carlisle can't be any more compassionate than his author, and that limits him. We had a fandom discussion about this a few years ago, but basically because SM doesn't see the problems with how the Quileute characters are treated in the story, none of the characters can, either. I remember calling it the moral version of how Alice is supposed to be a fashionista, but because SM doesn't really know anything about high fashion, there's a lot of 'tell' about her being this fashion icon but the actual show of clothes in the story doesn't live up to it. Or Carlisle himself -- he's supposed to be this genius doctor who has studied medicine and science for centuries, but SM isn't a doctor or a scientist, so some of the stuff she makes him say doesn't live up to the idea she planted. SM totally missed the settler-colonial stuff, the dehumanizing language, etc etc, so none of the characters, not even Compassionate Carlisle or Power-of-Heart Esme can.

tl;dr I like to think the compassion is real but hindered by the narrative insisting on prioritizing the love story AND Carlisle being unable to be more compassionate than his author. But that's because I WANT it to be real because I think the concept is really interesting, even if the execution is lacking. I don't need or want him to be Perfect or a Saint, and I'm sure existing as a VAMPIRE of all things would naturally come into conflict with compassion all the time (examples in the book is him not wanting to kill James and it leading to the extended hunt instead; offering surrender to Bree but knowing if he goes against the Volturi they could kill the whole family; telling Sam in BD that this isn't his fight and 'don't get your family slaughtered for pride,' even as Sam insists they have to be there for Jacob and Jacob has to be there for Nessie [blargh].) and that struggle and how he deals with it when he's in a situation with no Compassionate choice is available would be great. Even that car chase in Midnight Sun could maybe work if the story gave Carlisle any room to protest until Alice insists it's the Only Way!!!! or whatever, and some follow up where like oh huh weird some random charity swooped in to pay all the medical bills of everyone involved in the pile-up and bought them all new cars. If Edward, Jasper, etc can't turn off their gifts, Carlisle shouldn't be able to either, even when being forced into uncompassionate actions. But SM doesn't care. She only cares about Carlisle, let alone his compassion, inasmuch as she needed a kindly father figure to set up the vegetarian vampire thing and for Bella to have a convenient doctor.

[bradshawed]

how the grinch stole christmas with bradley pls!!! xx

warnings — fem!reader, mild swearing, fluff, jake slightly self-depreciating, fluff mastermind seresin, kissing

note — missed writing for tg:m so fucking much! apologies that it's not very christmassy, i only just remembered as i got to the end 😬 it's also doesn't flow the best so please excuse that. hope you like it x

drew's christmas celly x && main masterlist!

...

Bradley's been pining after you for years, not saying a word, or as Jake would put it "You're snug on that perch, waiting for just the right moment... that never comes." Maybe he was waiting for the right moment, or maybe he just simply wasn't interested and it was all in your head. Whatever it was, you were sick of waiting around to find out.

Who were you kidding, have you seen that man?!

You were used to the Dagger Squad leaving for months on end, having grown up around the Navy, so when they left, it didn't feel any different than usual. But the moment they got back, you knew something was off. And it was driving you insane trying to figure it out and decipher the looks they gave to each other.

Jake was going to punch Bradley. He was sick of Rooster longingly staring at you across the bar. If he heard the brunette give one more excuse as to why he hadn't asked you out yet, he was going to do it himself.

You would think a near death experience and reuniting with your reckless godfather would knock some sense into you but nooooo.

"Alright, that's it." Jake slammed the empty beer bottle on the table, the bar stool screeching on the hardwood floor as he stood up. Bradley's eyes narrowed tracking Jake's movements as the blonde sauntered to where you worked behind the bar.

"Hey Jake, what can I get y-"

"I won't say this twice so listen carefully. Bradshaw's in love with you but hasn't got the balls to admit it. He's scared of you putting you through what Carole went through or some bullshit because he's a good guy but he's depriving himself of a chance to fall in love with you and start a real family. Between us, he's got a better shot at it than me and I don't want him ending up like Mav so listen up.."

Your shift ended as per usual to the sweet croon of Bradley's rendition of Elvis' Can't Help Falling In Love for your ears only as you locked up.

"You and Jake were talking for a while tonight."

"Mmhm, I could talk about you for hours." You smiled cheekily at the blush creeping on his cheeks, "Walk with me?"

"Always."

You both walked in silence to the sound of the waves crashing on the beach.

"A little birdy told me you were in love with me."

Bradley's heart stopped, and his feet followed. His mind racing as his back turned rigid, Hangman was about to become a very literal call sign.

"Good thing I'm in love with you too."

Bradley's mind was still reeling from your first comment that he had barely processed the second. You'd said it so casually and matter-of-factly that- And god, you were smiling up at him so sweetly, waiting patiently as he processed that he was afraid his heart was about to burst.

Your heart was about to explode. He could probably hear it thumping under your his hoodie. Fuck. This is the last time you follow Jake's advice.

You turned to look at the moonlight reflecting on the calm water. Beautif-

Bradley's lips were on yours. Now you were the one in shock.

Fuck. He can't believe he'd missed out on this all because he was afraid. Maybe Jake was right, not that he'll ever admit it.

You both pulled away, catching your breath, your mind becoming increasingly aware of his hands on your waist.

"I- I don't know why I waited so long to tell you-"

"You still technically haven't." Bradley raised his eyebrows as if daring you to say more, his hand travelling up to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, effectively silencing you.

"I love you," he replied, kissing you sweetly again, "and I know we need to talk about this and that I've got a lot of lost time to make up for, but you're it for me. I've known that for a long time."

"You're it for me too B..."

"And Jake says Merry Christmas."

[vigilskeep]

you gonna check out Vows & Vengeance? Would love to get your first impression/takes on it

yeah i listened to ep 1 this morning!! one comment without context: the line “more or less” made me choke on my drink

some comments with spoilery context under the cut:

nadia & elio are fine, i wish their dialogue was a little less uhhh self-aware and expository (“we are having an argument and this is exactly how i feel and i will explain why my backstory is responsible! now i will state your character flaws clearly out loud for the audience!”) that’s a pet peeve of mine. they and their relationship feel a bit generic to me overall. like i say they’re just kind of fine

i guess i did enjoy that nadia’s right and elio does act like a magister and immediately try to solve problems like a magister when they come up. i always like when there’s a new character and the things they say ring true for where they’re coming from, it makes them feel uhhh rooted in the world? i suppose tevinter social class being plot relevant at all is nice in terms of just knowing they’re grounding things in the established lore

people announcing their spells by name so that you know what’s going on was deeply goofy i can’t decide whether or not i loved it

neve attempting to freeze an entire fucking bay to stop a boat and only failing because a magister cast his way out was insane. i said this about her protective dome in the initial gameplay reveal, but she is doing magic on a level we simply have not seen

ummmmm i liked the appearance from our good old wolf pal. it’s funny i feel like i’ve gotten much more fond of him lately. but at the same time whenever we’re not seeing him from an inquisition inner circle member’s perspective i kind of re-learn the way i saw him when he killed felassan at the end of the masked empire. the way i see him when he’s not the guy the inquisition knows, you know? he seems more dangerous and unpredictable to me when we’re looking through a different set of eyes than as one of the people he had to interact with for so long and deal with as people rather than merely obstacles to his greater purpose. i don’t inherently trust him or put anything past him in the same way when he’s dealing with someone he doesn’t have that uh soft spot for

though that “i’m sorry” when things went bad seems demonstrative of the effect dai had on him. it’s not exactly the response of a man who can still convince himself these aren’t really people. anyway no idea what happened in that funny little ritual but rip to another of his a+ plans. you’ll get there one day buddy

not entirely convinced at all that it’s really elio that nadia is hearing 😬

the idea that a person in tevinter hears the words “the hinterlands” and immediately knows it means the hinterlands in ferelden (which i can only assume is what it means) is so stupid i was genuinely taken aback like be serious jsgsjsjsk

[kyberblade]

Give It To Me In Basic (Din x Reader)

A/N: This is just something that the premise came to mind when I listened to a song and I couldn’t let it sit. I wrote it in practically one sitting and just saw where it went - it was basically an exercise to stretch my writing muscles after a while away, and it felt really good! It’s incredibly sappy and domestic and I hope you like it. 🥹 (Not a part of my other series, this is an entirely new Din x Reader to me. Hi. Hello.) I also wanted to try writing in “she/her” instead of “you”, but this is still definitely an entirely blank reader insert. No physical descriptions are used. No mention of Y/N.

I do not own Star Wars or it’s characters. Sadly. But I carry them in my heart. Does that count for something? My soul says yes.

Summary: Din finds softness after a life of rigidity, and he’s not willing to let it go. (*Chandler Bing voice* Could I have been more vague?)

Warnings: Fluff? Like tooth rotting amounts of fluff and domesticity. Din being a sap. Grogu being the cutest thing you ever did see, and Din is once again a warning in and of himself in this one. Swearing. Mentions of typical show violence. Mando’a. Swearing. Mentions of pregnancy at the end. Some spoilers if you squint? (But if you’re here, you know how this works.) (No but like really, it follows the plot of season 2 and TBoBF, so mentions of that briefly, if you don’t want that spoiled, don’t read.) Helmetless Din. What? Who said that? 👀😬 Again: No mention of Y/N. (In fact this is written as “she/her” instead of “you”, but is an entirely blank reader insert.)

Word count: 1,206 (I know. I am as shocked as you are at how brief this is.)

Thanks to @fordo-kixed-rex for reading over this and sending me a caps locked series of texts as a response. And to @what-the-heckin-heck and @littlemisspascal for telling me it’s not too fluffy/sappy/much.

Masterlist

Xxx

There was a softness Din had come to know, grown familiar with, and let it entangle with his life like a well kept plant on someone’s warm windowsill.

It had snuck up on him when he’d least expected it. Not in the middle of a battle, or on some backwater planet, but in the quiet moments in between.

It had a heart unlike anything he’d ever seen. Something vibrant and larger than life, that welcomed him and his son with open arms and without a second glance.

The heart was worn on the sleeve of a woman, who by every standard was normal, nothing brilliant or captivating, but to Din she was everything. He couldn’t look away whenever she was nearby, her beauty both inside and out something that pulled him in with a force he didn’t understand.

Her touch sent shockwaves across his skin, the first time she shook his hand making him shudder even through his gloves. As time went on and he found himself lost in a darkened hull of the Crest, the woman at his side as they tangled further up in one another, his breath caught in his chest as her slight hand reached up to cup his cheek.

It wasn’t the touch of a lover, the sensuality of the trace of her fingers that stole from him. It was the closeness. The nearness. Something in the touch felt like home.

And he never felt at home again unless those hands were cradling him in some way, even through his armor. He’d lean into the touch, though he couldn’t feel it through his beskar, he swore he could. This was home. This is what he was trying to come back to.

Her laugh made him laugh. A foreign and buzzing feeling climbing out of his chest. Just the thought of it made him chuckle, shaking his head and telling his contact it was nothing, he was just amazed the bounty was so stupid.

Maybe it was selfish, but he didn’t want to share her with anyone. He’d found a little slice of happiness in this godforsaken galaxy, why did he have to let anyone else know about it?

When he lay on the ground, wind knocked out of him after an enemy had gotten a lucky hit, it wasn’t the sky above he saw, it was her eyes. They sparkled mischievously at him anytime she plotted her next move, often to get him to just relax. 

For years he’d seen calculating gazes, sneers, narrowed eyes of distrust and hate. He saw none of these with her. Only peace.

How ironic, he thought, getting back to his feet before causing carnage. To get back to the softness, there must first be all this chaos.

He saw it each time he came home. The light dulled just slightly in her eyes. She loved him just as much, if not more than before, but she longed to tell him while looking into his own eyes. She knew the Creed. She understood. Doesn’t mean it hurt any less. For either of them.

It was a night on the Crest, he woke with a start at the silence. He didn’t hear the child’s snores. Realization sunk in as he remembered the kid was with the Jedi. He was used to the silence as he slept, then he became used to the kids soft sounds, but they’re gone now. But slowly he eased back asleep, his eyes falling slowly shut when he realized she was there, in his arms, breathing deep and sound asleep…. His new familiar. He softly smiled as she started to snore.

Now the child was back in his care, and he was off to Mandalore to restore his honor, become a Mandalorian in the eyes of the Creed once more. His new ship had no room for anyone other than himself and Grogu, so he made arrangements to leave her on Navarro with Karga. 

After a private goodbye, where he saw the disappointment she would never voice once again painting her features, he set the ship to ascend up into the atmosphere. Once he was just above the clouds, he made a last minute decision, hailing her on her comm as he made a loop to come back around under the cloud cover.

“Look up,” was all he would say. 

But as he made a final pass by, just under the clouds without his helmet, he could see her on the ground, her smile like a beacon for miles around. From this distance the only thing she could really see clearly was his smile, but that was everything.

Her breath stuttered over the comm. “Meh'shab? Me'dinuir…. Ranov'la. Me'dinuir…. Mesh’la.” (“The fuck? To share…. Secret. To give each other…. Beautiful.”)

Din laughed. “Wanna try that again?”

She huffed. “Sorry. Ori'meshla.” (“Very beautiful.”)

Din snorted out a laugh.

She sighed, her words coming out barely above a breath. “Stars, I hope our ad has your smile.” (“Child.”)

Din paused, about to pull up on the controls. “What?”

“Wayii! Did I say that out loud?” She looked up to see Din circling lower and lower. “Don’t you dare land, Din Djarin.” The N1 was getting lower still as she spoke. “I mean it. You have planets to save. People to meet and-” The exhaust of the starfighter sent her hair every which way, her face scrunching up against the gust. “What was I thinking you would do, I don’t know?” The last words were mumbled into Din’s chest plate, his arms pulling her into him as soon as he was back on the ground. (Exclamation of surprise)

“Are you….?” His voice was barely above a whisper, his modulator popping with the lack of sound behind it.

She nodded into his beskar. “Yaihadla.”

“As much as I love you speaking Mando’a, just give it to me in Basic. My brain isn’t working properly right now-”

She tilted her head back to look up into his visor, her voice soft. “I’m pregnant, Din.” Her eyes scanned over his helmet, searching for purchase. “You’re gonna be a dad, Djarin.” Grogu squealed from the cockpit of the N1, pulling her eyes over toward the tiny green ward, and a smile up her face. “Well, again. You’ll be a dad, again.”

Din froze for a moment before reaching up and ripping his helmet off, immediately pulling her into a searing kiss. Her muffled sounds of surprise melted away after just a moment, her arms coming up around his neck to pull him closer still, and causing his lips to pull up into a smile against her own. Finally breaking the kiss, he leaned his forehead against hers, both of them breathing heavily.

“Careful,” she teased, “that’s how we got into this situation in the first place.”

Din just shook his head in amusement at her, chuckling, and never removing his forehead from hers. Looking up through his lashes, he found her already doing the same to him. “Hi,” he muttered quietly.

“Hi,” she replied on a breath, making his smile pull higher still. “Osik,” she continued on a breath, going on when he cocked his head to the side, pulling back just slightly. “I really hope they get your smile.” (“Shit.”)

Xxx

Everything Tags: @lam-ila @oliviajdjarin @peonyophelia @itsavicf @jxvipike @momc95 @babygirlrex0504 @harriedandharassed @burningfieldof-clover @theclassicvinyldragon What’s This?

[cupcake-hearts]

So I'm watching 'Class of the Titans' and I have some opinions, mainly about the gods.

Keep in mind I've only watched up to episode 18 of the first season.

Hermes - goofball. Love him. Like most on this list I wasn't sure about his design, but I have to get over the fact this isn't 'Blood of Zeus' (they can't all be sexy.) also him being Odie's mentor is so cute. Especially if you listen to 'epic' the musical.

Hera- honestly, I like how she's in charge. I still don't know where Zeus went but I really don't miss him. Very mature, very mothering, very different from ancient Greece Hera. I think she is supposed to be Jay's mentor, but nobody said it specifically.

Athena - 'badass in the arena', and best den mother. Not sure about her running around barefoot but they definitely leaned more into her warrior fighting side than the wisdom side.

Artemis - HAS KIDS!? what part of virgin goddess did they not understand? Atlanta being her descendant just throws me off. I love her but they should have made an Amazon her ancestor (more thoughts on that for another post). At this point I haven't seen enough of her to say yeah or neigh. Definitely don't hate her and she seems fun.

Herakles- like Artemis, not much to go on. He seems cool. I do head cannon that Harry's grandma is also a descendant from Herakles. How else do you explain this 80 something year old bad ass riding a giant eagle in battle?

Ares- considering his representation in modern media it could have been a lot worse. In the show he's still this gruff and sometimes rude warrior type, but never even close to evil or bad. I think he's supposed to be Archie's mentor. Weird choice considering the gods I listed above all have some close connection to the kids' ancestors. Closest connection would be the Trojan War, during which Achilles kills one of Ares's daughters.😬

Persephone - wasn't thrilled with her first appearance but I actually like her, demon tantrums and all. From what I remember, Theresa doesn't know much about Greek mythology, but she knows that Persephone spends time in both the underworld and living world, meaning that they must have talked about their personal lives to each other. I find that adorable.

Aphrodite - my queen! Just shallow enough to be vain but not uncaring or unkind. Much like the others, I'm sad we don't get to see more of her. Her relationship with Neil seems to be the closest and I have a feeling they knew each other long before Kronos broke out of Tartarus.

[hyunsvngs]

You want to talk about jeongin that's one of my favourite subjects, I was the anon that was asking if you did requests because jeongin takes over my mind 24/7 so I'll share it here 😌

Recently I can't stop thinking about no matter what the boys are always going to look at jeongin like he's a baby but what of he gets a partner and he doesn't talk about what they do together, I feel like he's kinda private about that stuff at the beginning but certain things would happen or he'd do things not really thinking it's a big deal but the rest of the members brains are running a hundred miles a minute because no way there baby just did that like for example let's say there on tour and there picking up souvenirs for family and friends and jeongin see's sex chocolate and him and his partner have talk about trying it together and he hasn't seen them in months thinks it'd be a nice gift for when he gets back and he moves on and keeps looking at things but the members that are around him are mortified they can't believe he was so casual about it

Another situation I think about let's say there ordering food there just having a night in after there hectic schedules and jeongin offer's to pay for the food they don't complain it's free food so he pulls out his wallet to order the food with it but while doing so polaroid's fall out of it of him doing back shots some are his partner all fucked out with his cum on there chest maybe some degrading words are written across there body and he just picks it up and laughs a little and just says "sorry your weren't supposed to see that😊" and just continues to put the order in

A thing I think would really make it hit the members would be of they heard him have sex I don't think jeongin would purposely have it happen maybe he asks if he can just have the dorm for the night because he wants to have his partner in his space instead and the members understand and agree to spend the night at the other boy's dorm, later on into the evening one of them forget something dont think anything of it and head back to pick it up maybe even drop by a little convenient store to get some sweets to say sorry for intruding in on there little date, they punch the code into the keypad and right as they open the door there feet haven't even made it into the dorm yet and they just here jeongin fucking his partner within an inch of there life they can here him talk them through it, what he's gonna do if they dont start listening to him and the boys are devastated 😭 there baby how could he be doing all this and then pretending like nothing has changed, they definitely turn there asses around not even remembering what they even went back for and the walk to the other dorm was dead silent nobody wants to talk about it they couldn't even eat the sweet they bought

After this all happens Chan will try give him the birds and the bees talk and jeongin looks at him like 'bro it's a bit late for that😬'

That's all I've got for now but if I think of anything else I'll be sure to share it here 😌

I RLY LOVE THIS ACTUALLY LMFAOOOOO LIKE JEONGIN BEING SECRETIVE BUT ALSO… SO CASUAL ANOUT IT? I THINK THATS SOOO HIM